The Ultimate Collection of the Most Savage Comebacks Ever

67. Shoot Him Down

My brother and his friend were at some party and there was a gaggle of hot babes that caught everyone’s attention.

They were both intimidated, but the friend worked up the courage to go up to one of them and say, “Do you want to dance?”

She looked him up and down with a snotty expression on her face, clearly about to shoot him down. She says, “What did you say?”

He goes, “I said you look fat in those pants“

68. Eyebrow Game

Me and some friends went into a gas station convenience store for some snacks once. These two girls outside are arguing (like friends arguing, not hostile). We go in to get our snacks to come out and all of a sudden one of them YELLS,

“You’re just mad that my eyebrow game is stronger than your relationships!”

And that’s the story of how I nearly had an asthma attack for the first time in over 10 years.

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69. Pretty Great!

I worked with an old cranky guy who always had great comebacks.

He was at a party with his new wife when her ex-husband walked up to him and asked, “So, how’s it feel being married to my used goods?”

My coworker replied, “Well, it’s pretty great once you get past the used part.”

The ex-husband just got a pissed off look on his face and walked away.

70. Condescending Way

My wife and I took our girls out to meet my wife’s side of the family. On our first day staying at her brother’s, he was making everyone breakfast. My daughter who was 8 had us busting up laughing. He was trying to ask her if he needed to make her a plate but he ended up talking to her in a slightly condescending way. So he asks “Do you need me to make your plate for you?” she replied, “No I’ve had food before.” One of the funniest things to happen on the whole trip. Was so good.