The Customer’s Always Right? These Stories Beg to Differ

Hot and Spicy Drama

A guy orders “Hot and Spicy Onion Rings” with a subheading of “Onion rings coated in a hot chilli batter”. These were one of the favourites at the restaurant I used to manage, the same recipe was used for as long as I remember the place existed.

I notice one of his toddlers gasping for air, so instinctively I run over with a glass of water, hand it to him and check on the kid. I ask him what’s up and the boy says “burns!! hot!!”. The young lad’s about 3 or 4…

I clear up any debris on the table from the ordeal and walk back to the bar to check on staff, closely followed by his father.

The father claims he’s going to seek legal action because I served the onion rings to the table and didn’t make him aware that they had chilli in. He stated that every other time he’d been to the restaurant they never served them with chilli and the last time he visited, he said, was 1 month ago. It was my responsibility to make sure he knew they were hot, apparently.

F*ck that — I pointed out that the item on the menu contained the word hot, spicy and chilli more than once and that it was his responsibility to ensure the food that HE fed to his kids was suitable, not mine.

He blushed after seeing the menu information and blushed even more when I showed him the printed on a date on the back of the menu. Nearly a year prior to the incident.

Needless to say, I enjoyed every second of knowing I, the manager, was 100% right.

itsbri

A Bow Tie Rebel

When I was 17 I worked at Walgreens and the dress code stated that men had to wear a collared shirt and tie. So me being a smart a** I used to wear a polka dot shirt with a black bow tie once a week. The old ladies loved it and commented on how it’s a shame nobody wears bow ties anymore. One day a grumpy middle-aged lady came in and was infuriated that her prescription was not ready yet and proceeded to yell at me at tell me how stupid my tie and shirt were and my mother should be beaten for letting me leave the house like that. I told her it’s not nice to bring someone’s mom into this. The store manager heard the lady yelling and came over, this is when the lady started telling the manager it’s “unprofessional” for me to wear a polka dot shirt and bow tie. Sadly I was told not to wear them anymore to appease the customer.

The Onion Revolution

I work at Panera Bread and this summer we just got a “re-imagining” of an old salad. So this lady walks in and orders the salad. I make the salad, call out her name and wait for her to come to pick up her order. She comes picks it up and asks, “What the heck is this?” I told her it was our new salad. She states that she doesn’t want this and she wants the old salad. I get that, it’s fine whatever. I make her the old salad, I give it to her, and she sits down. Now, she gets back up and goes straight to my general manager and b*tches about how the salad has too many onions. My general manager apologizes and offers to make her another one, but no this wasn’t good enough for her and wants her money back. She storms out and I get b*tched at by my general manager about how I put too much onion in the salad.

zerocool90

The Price of Cleanliness

Had a customer ask for a discount because I touched the shoes as I put them back in their shoebox. Because I was wearing a Manger-Trainee tag, she kept insisting that my Manger would do it–in that condescending tone, you only get when you think you’re helping someone not be an idiot.

She then demanded I hand scrub the shoes with our cleaning liquid so they were clean for her kid–insisting that my Manager would do that.

F*ck me–I did it. I hate that job some days.

reddituser

A Drive-Thru Odyssey

At the drive-thru.

“I want a grande iced vanilla latte”

“Sure thing! Anything else for you to-“

“No, I do not want a caffé latte, I want an iced vanilla latte”

“Yes ma’am, a grande iced vanilla latte. Anyth-“

“No, it shows a caffé latte, I just want a regular latte”

“Yes. A grande iced vanilla latte. Anything else?”

“No! I just want an iced vanilla latte, not a caffé latte ugh”

Hotter Than Hot

I worked at a chicken wing restaurant where we had 9 flavors, including Cajun. Now, I used to assume that most people know that Cajun is a spicy flavor, but apparently, not everyone does. Still, the menu description definitely says that it is hot and spicy.

One morning I came into work and there was a message on our answering machine from right after we’d closed the night before. A woman ordered a ten-piece of Cajun wings. Apparently, they were so spicy that after taking a single bite of a wing, she got heartburn so bad that she had to stop and get a hotel room with her boyfriend. She wanted us to refund her purchase, pay for her hotel room and the meal she had to buy for her hungry boyfriend, and then give her a bunch of additional free food.

I called the number she left and her mother answered. When I explained the issue, she told me not to worry about it. I didn’t.

Good Intentions Go Awry

I worked in a photo lab and we were required to do spec enlargements on a certain percentage of orders. The customer could buy them or turn them down.

This one customer came in to get the film developed. She mentioned that she owned a restaurant and there was a few pictures of her grandbaby in a cauldron and if there was a good one, she was going to have it enlarged to put up in her restaurant. Perfect spec opportunity!

So, I found the obviously best one, even cropped it to get some crap out of the background, and put it with her order. Her husband came to pick up. I mentioned our earlier conversation and told him he didn’t have to get the enlargement. I even offered to save it if he wanted to send her in later to make the decision. He decided to buy it.

Later, I get a call reaming my a** about that stupid enlargement. How dare I take it upon myself to go through her pictures and make that enlargement. I explained it was company policy to do that anyway and pointed out our conversation. Could not make her happy with any explanation so I told her when my manager would be there.

She came in when he was there and reamed me out to him. He also explained it was our company policy to do spec enlargements.

She goes, “It’s like if I took a dress to a seamstress and asked to have it let out and they took it in instead. This is not good customer service when you don’t give the customer what they order!”

I said, “But you got what you ordered (the prints from your roll of film). It’s more like if you went to a seamstress, she did the dress exactly how you wanted, plus she had a necklace that would go with the dress perfectly and offered for you to buy the necklace when you came to pick the dress up. Your husband didn’t have to buy the enlargement, but that was his choice. I’m sorry he’s not allowed to make choices like that, but it’s not my fault.”

She wasn’t happy about that either, obviously. We offered to refund the enlargement (as we had all along) but no, she wanted to keep it.

The Cherry On Top

I was working at Godiva a few years ago and we sold these drinks there called “Chocolixers”. Well, one day a couple came in, around 50-60 years old, and wanted a drink. I made small talk, joked around, being friendly, with them while I had them pay and started to prepare the drinks.

Towards the end, I realized we ran out of whipped cream and I asked if that was okay. I had expected a, “Yeah, sure!” but no, he looked completely shocked, and started going on about how the whipped cream was ESSENTIAL and won’t have it without whipped cream. Completely unsure as to what to do, I went to my manager who agreed to make a refund.

The customer then flips out when asked for information and clearly made some b*llsh*t name/address up. My manager calmly explained to the customer that we needed his name and address in order for us to refund the $4 back. Outraged, the customer grabs the paper and throws it in my manager’s face and storms out the door. Before he left, he shook his fist and said “Corporate will be hearing about this tomorrow.”

It was whipped cream, dude. Calm down.

Smells Like Trouble

I worked at Bath and Body Works for many many years. Fragrances tend to come and go, some stick around forever like cucumber melon and sweet pea but most eventually go so new ones can come in. This upsets a lot of customers because they get used to a certain scent they enjoy, most people when told their fragrance has been discontinued are like oh wow that sucks, I suggest one that may be similar and they move on.

One time this lady came in looking for a scent we no longer carried. I told her this, and she just looked at me with this sort of sociopathic stare and said ” I know you have some in the back” I very kindly explained to her that, we do not have any, our semi-annual sale in which we do sometimes have some older fragrances has ended and what you see is what we have. She didn’t believe me. I went back to “look” to humor her but our backroom is the size of a closet and I was well aware we did not have this.

She threw an absolute fit, accusing me of lying, insisting the scent was not discontinued, and somehow she got the idea I was just “too f*cking lazy” to climb the ladder because it was probably on the top shelf. She blamed me personally that we didn’t have it, and basically told me she knew about my conspiracy to hide sh*t in the backroom. She was completely nuts.

Late Night Special

I’m a cook at this mom-and-pop grill in a small town that closes at 9 on Monday-Thursdays. Every Wednesday we have this couple that shows up at 8:50 (and sometimes later) and repeatedly orders something weird or makes us alter their meals. Every single Wednesday never fails. For those who don’t know or don’t care showing up ten minutes to close really pisses the cooks off seeing as how we have most of the stuff cleaned and broken down as it takes a while to clean the kitchen and we’re tired and want to go home. Well, the most recent f*ckery they pulled was they ordered an appetizer of our black bean nachos, which has the beans already mixed with beef. They decided they didn’t want the beans and proceeded to have our waitress ring back the nachos but with 2 ground up hamburgers, and patty instead. After the server brought it to them they claimed it tasted like Taco Bell nachos (which doesn’t sound that bad to me) and made her take it back and bring them the regular black bean nachos instead. It’s well past closing time at this point and I inform the server that we tossed the old nacho meat and didn’t have any left. They got pretty pissed, refused to pay for the drinks they already finished, and stormed out. Haven’t seen them in 3 weeks.

Change is Hard to Come By

As a grocery store cashier, I had an old man giving me his money not giving me enough (he was like eighty cents short). I politely told him that he still owed me eighty cents, but he looked at me, and in a weak voice, told me to keep the change.

Once again, I reminded him he was short. “Keep the change!” His voice grew more and more frustrated. “But sir…” “Keep the change!” He began to slowly trudge out of the store.

I just paid the rest of the eighty cents myself.

Etab

Refund Roulette

A woman came into my store and asked if her computer had finished being worked on. We’d barely had the computer for 24 hours and told her it was still being worked on. She immediately flipped out when we told her it would be done that day. Looking at her work order it said that we would call the next day once the computer had been diagnosed. We were on track to have the computer fixed by the next morning, but she demanded we give her the computer back and refund her for the repair. I oblige and ask if she has her receipt. She gives me a stern, “No.” So I ask if she has her claim check. To which I get another stern “No!” So I ask if she has a driver’s license. She replies, “I don’t drive!” At the end of my rope, I say, “Do you have any form of identification on you?” Her reply was, “Why are you making this so difficult?” Knowing all heck is about to break loose I as calmly as possible state, “I can’t give you a computer without some kind of ID.” She totally flies off the handle and starts screaming for a manager and tells me to go away. I get our manager and an employee who was working at her time of check-in. He vouches for her, so my manager starts the refund process. Of course, she wrote a check for $250, way over the $150 cash return limit. The manager explains that we have to mail her a check. Now the woman is threatening to call the police saying that we’re trying to steal from her. As a total exception, General Manager comes out and breaks the sale into 3 returns that can each be returned as cash. Obviously, this takes a little while to break apart the transactions and get enough cash into the register. So of course she starts yelling at the GM for taking his “sweet time.” And it gets better. We had several visiting GM’s walking through at the time. She grabs another GM from a different store and starts screaming at him. He’s a total deer in headlights and has no idea what’s going on. Finally my GM snaps and in a half-yelling voice tells her to get out of the store. Obviously, she’s gravely offended by this, scoffs at my GM, and walks out after silently collecting her computer and cash. Totally unnecessary! The customer is not always right! People need to be reasonable in all aspects of life.

Plastic Bag Panic

I’m a produce guy at a grocery store. There are literally 15 rolls of plastic bags in the department. I got yelled at by an elder customer (mid 70’s)because we were empty in one spot. When he asked me to fill the empty roll bags so he could shop I had to explain to him that the supply shipment was late. The customer being a total a**h*le stomped his feet like a 5-year-old and screamed at me… “I JUST NEED YOU TO DO YOUR JOB!” My response was, you can get yourself a bag from over here or if you really want a bag and there’s a roll here and here and here and here and there and here and there. He literally went to the store manager to complain about the plastic roll bag being empty where he wanted to shop, so I took a full roll off of another display and put it where the empty spot was. Let’s just say history repeated itself.

The All Shoe Lady

Back when I was a shoe store manager, I was working alone one day about a month before Christmas.

I’d like you to note my store had the name ‘Moc’ for Moccasin in it.

This woman came in saying her granddaughter was a size 6. What did I have in a size 6 moccasin?

“About 50 different styles, each in multiple colours and beading patterns”, I said. “It amounts to probably about 120 pairs I could potentially have in my back room. Any particular colour? With beads, or without? With a rubber or plastic sole so she could wear them outside, or a leather sole for indoors? Suede or smooth leather? Deerskin, cowhide, moose hide? With rabbit fur, or not? Sheepskin lining, or unlined?”

“Oh, just bring out every size 6 you have.”

“But ma’am”, I said, “I have about 120 possible pairs. I am also helping several other customers at the moment. Can you please help narrow down the selection?”

“No. Bring out every pair of 6’s you have.”

At this point, even the other customers are looking incredulous or sniggering.

F*ck it, I thought. There was no way I’d leave the storefront empty while I climbed ladders and pulled every godd*mn size six in stock. I was the boss, I was alone. I said unless she would narrow down her preferences, I couldn’t help. She freaked out at me, but I just shrugged and went on helping the reasonable people.

She called the next day, asking to speak to the manager. I replied “Oh! You’re the All the Shoe lady. That was me yesterday, and I am the manager. Have a nice day.” And I hung up.

Nothing ever came of it, and to this day we all remember the All the Shoe lady.

“Can You Try This On?”

A woman walks into the store, loudly talking using an obviously fake Hispanic accent. She immediately finds 3 outfits she likes, then makes eye contact with me and tells whoever she’s talking to she’ll call them later. The following conversation went like this…

Me: Can I help you find anything?

Lady: It’s my cousin’s birthday and I’m surprising her with a 3-day trip to Salem. I’m buying her some outfits for the trip.

Me: Oh well how nice of you! I wish I had a cousin as great as you.

Lady: Thing is, she’s not my size and I have no idea if any of this is going to fit her.

Me: We have a 60-day return policy and all our items come in sizes xxs-4xl. If it doesn’t fit you can return it as long as the tags are intact and you have a receipt.

Lady: abruptly walks away to speak to my manager in a hushed tone. She cuts off my manager as she’s talking and walks away, leaving my manager looking pissed off and confused

Lady: I need you to try these on for me. You’re the same size as my cousin and I can see how they fit before she gets them

My manager had to step in to tell her that my job is to man the register, not model for customers. And she actually had the deep-fried audacity to be offended that I was not there to help her in that way.

Money Back Madness

When I used to work the Customer Service counter at a grocery I got screamed at for refusing to give a guy his money back on some bad bread we sold him. Dude didn’t have his receipt, the bread, or even the packaging the bread was sold in.

Just walked up and said, “I want my money back.”

“Sure, you got a receipt or the packaging?”

“No, and I shouldn’t have to!”

“How can I return it, or know how much to give you if you don’t have a receipt or the packaging?”

“Are you some sort of IDIOT?!!?!?!?! GIVE ME BACK MY MONEY, RIGHT NOW!”

“MANAGER! MANAGER!” x10 times until the manager came up. I was promptly told to give the dude three bucks. When I pointed out that I can’t even open the till until a transaction was made, the manager just deep sighed, walked around the counter and used his key to open the till.

The angry customer then yelled, “SEE? WAS THAT SO F*CKING HARD?” as he stormed out.

“Fruit Salad” Drink

I bartended all through college at this bayside bar in Ocean City, MD.

Every Tuesday, we had a “Senior Deck Party,” where we’d set up a free buffet with all the mushy foods you can think of. The seniors would come through, grab a couple of happy hour drinks, gorge on potato salad, and head out.

There was this one lady named Rose that would come, take up 2 seats at the bar (one for her and one for her purse) and sit there all day, demanding the following:

A ginger ale in a highball glass with 2 orange slices, one lime slice, a lemon slice, 3 cherries, and 2 straws.

She never touched the fruit, it was only a status thing, and I was supposed to fill up her ginger ale every time it got to half a glass to restore carbonation.

Any bartender will tell you, fruit is a precious commodity. This routine caused me extreme mental anguish.

I should also add, SHE NEVER TIPPED.

No Salad for You

I waitressed at a pizza place by myself during the day on the weekends. Usually, on Sundays, we would get busy and on this particular Sunday, I had a few large tables and a couple of small tables by myself. It was to the point where I was running to place orders and every time I went back to the kitchen I had at least 4-5 things I had to do (place orders for table A, table E, G, and B need refills, table H’s order just came out, etc.)

So I’m literally running to place an order and grab things when this table pulls me aside. It was two elderly couples and they had already made things complicated when their friends came in and joined them so I had to place another order and they had a lot of requests. So they stop me on my way to the kitchen and one woman asked me to place an order for a salad. Her friend got one so now she wanted one. Except she didn’t want the “dark green stuff.” She literally asked for salad but without half the salad because of its color. I told her the salads came pre-packaged as a mix. She said, “Well you can just pick it out for me then.”

Sorry picking the bits out of your salad that you don’t want, isn’t my job. Especially when I’m waitressing 5 other tables.